Saturday, January 26, 2013

A Rose By Any Other Name


It’s Finish The Sentence Friday…well, to be honest, that was yesterday but I’ve been moving a little slowly this week—I haven’t even done the post for the award I got—so let’s just pretend I got finished on time (and be glad the link is still open!).  In any case, this week’s sentence is “When I was younger, I tried…”

Here’s my contribution:

When I was younger, I tried to get everyone to call me Kimberly instead of Kim…but I wasn’t assertive enough until I was much older.

Which most people probably think is silly…Kimberly, Kim what’s the difference? 

And that’s kind of a long story…a story that started when I was 5 years old and desperately wanted a cat. Unfortunately, the fact that I—and my whole family—are all wildly allergic to cat fur created an insurmountable hurdle.  I was devastated…and my grandmother decided to console me with the book One Kitten For Kim.  Except she clearly didn’t look at the book very closely:

 Notice anything odd about Kim? Anything that might upset a 5 year old Kim who desperately wanted a kitten?

Like the fact that the Kim in the book IS A BOY??!!

Which was a crushing blow to my self-identity….a boy’s name.  I had a BOY’S NAME.  Clearly, I was doomed to a life of androgyny and social exile.

Then, to make matters worse, I made one of the classic blunders: I confided in my brothers.

Now don’t get me wrong, my two brothers are good people.   They’re kind, compassionate, supportive…

At least they are NOW.

But at the time they were kids.  And BOY kids at that.  So when I said, in near hysteria, “Mom and Dad gave me a BOY’S name!”  They very helpfully explained that this was because when I was born Mom and Dad had really wanted a boy.

“Who’d want a girl?”  One of them asked.

“No one!”  The other affirmed.

(It is interesting to note that both of my brothers now maintain that this event never took place and turn the conversation to the time I told the younger one that we had found him under a bridge living with trolls…was everyone this mean to their siblings or were we just warped?)

Anyway, this revelation was enough to push me over into full blown hysterics.  I ran sobbing to my mom and started screaming about my boy’s name and how they didn’t want me and so on.

I think it goes without saying that I was a little high strung.

Luckily, my mom had one of those perfect parenting moments.  “I don’t know why you’re so upset,” she said.  “Your name is Kimberly not Kim.”

The fact that no one really called me Kimberly occurred to me but was just a new target for my obsessive personality.  It became a personal mission to get people to start calling me Kimberly instead.

It took 13 years.

Because when I was younger, I wasn’t that assertive.  I was a little too worried about people liking me, a little too worried about offending other people…so, I’d say “You know, I really prefer Kimberly but you know, whatever.”

It wasn’t until college that I got pushy about it, insisting on Kimberly instead of Kim.  And it worked.   Which was just fuel to the crazy fire...By the time I graduated and joined “the real world” I was flat out obnoxious about it, correcting people, pretending not to hear when I was hit with a “drive by Kimming”

A little over the top, I know.  But I couldn’t help it because, after all, Kim is a boy’s name.

 

For other childhood stories, click the link below:
Finish the Sentence Friday

 

16 comments:

  1. Thanks seriously for sharing this and I tried for a bit to be called Jennifer, because it was the in and popular name. I even asked whey I had to be named Janine, so I can relate to this just slightly, but now at 35 years old I have come to terms and actually do like my name. Hey it only took 30+ years, lol!! Thanks again for linking up as always!! :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL--when I got married, I had three different Jennifers in my wedding--2 of them my sisters-in-law. I think Janine is much better!

      Delete
  2. This is great! I love it! I would have reacted the same way. I go by Kate most of the time now, but anyone that knew me before college knows me as Katherine (family/old friends), b/c I got nicknamed "Kondor Kate" in college (it has to do with swooping down on my food to eat or something like that). Anyway, I never liked the name Kathy (it's great for others just not me) and anytime someone would/does call me Kathy I would get so upset - not it's just a minor irritation. It's amazing how much our names impact our lives.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is odd how our names can represent different times of our lives...all my friends from my "pre-assertive" days call me Kim, all my college friends and beyond call me Kimberly and a lot of the newest people in my life call me Kimbo...it's like I'm 3 different people!

      Delete
  3. I can relate! On the first day of 6th grade, I was put in the wrong P.E. class because they thought I was a boy. I still get mail for Mr. Dana every once in awhile. Found you via FTSF - great post!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol! Didn't even think about Dana being a boy's name; it sounds "girly" to me...but "Kim" sounds girly to most people as well.

      Delete
  4. Hi Kimberly! (Got to be careful to get that name right!) Fantastic post for FTSF! I can totally relate. I'm an only child, and my parents called me Joan Veronica in a Spanish speaking country!
    They obviously thought I would remain to-the-core British all my life! That was not what really happened, instead, my first name "Joan" is pronounced any old which way by Spanish speakers! I tried for years to be called Veronica, which is the same in both languages, but it didn't catch on. I'm doomed to be Jo-an, Yow-an, Jan, Juan (male), anything that more or less works with my written first name! I reallyliked Veronica, but now I'm just me warts and all! Have a good day and keep the posts rolling out!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Ohh, I love the name Veronica! But even my husband tells me Kimberly is too many syllables--Joan Veronica didn't have a chance!

      Delete
  5. Hi Kimberly. I love the part about your brothers. Funny how they're so dang mean when we're younger to grow up fabulous. I was adopted and my brothers weren't...so an easy one for them was to call me a bastard. I usually got them back by reminding them that they were total accidents.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. LOL...I think I was just as bad to my brothers as they were to me but it's more fun to remember THEIR shortcomings!

      Delete
  6. Ah, Kimberley. Brothers can be SO mean! My mom used to make me wear a brown cardigan and my brothers would call me 'brown cardigan Jo'. I know, not that awful right? But they were so horrid about it, they would make me cry. they's say it smelled like poo. I begged mum to get me a different one, so she got me a green one. Then they called it my 'snot' cardigan. Mean shits they were.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Lol--brothers can be awful! Hope yours improved as much as mine did!

      Delete
  7. LOL! My given name is Theresa, but my dad always called me Terry. When I found out it was a boy's name, I changed the spelling to make it a little more girl-like: Terrye.

    In the second grade, my teacher kept giving me F's on my spelling papers even though all the words were spelled correctly. My mom finally drove down to the school to find out WTF!

    "Your daughter repeatedly spells her name wrong. If she can't spell her name correctly, it's obvious she can't spell at all."

    The teacher got a healthy dose of angry Southern Mother. ;) And now, I'm Terrye.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. This brings back memories of my second grade teacher (seriously, SCARIEST WOMAN EVER)...glad your mom set her straight!

      Delete
  8. This sounds like my childhood mission to get everyone to call me Natti instead of Natalie, because in my eleven-year-old mind, Natalie was bo-ring.
    After I succeeded, of course in college I went back to "Natalie" because I was tired of correcting people, and I sort of outgrew my aversion to it.

    ReplyDelete
  9. I totally get not being assertive when you were younger and learning to be more so as you get older - that is me! And I like Kimberly. I like going with the original in its entirety. :)

    Great blog! Am your newest follower!

    Kate @ http://seriouslykateblog.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete