Me "I need you to finish packing."
Opie, slightly confused, "You know that you haven't finished packing, right? Your stuff's all over the spare room."
Me "Of course I know, I'm not a moron."
Opie "Then why do I have to finish packing right now?"
Sometimes it's like he's meeting me for the first time.
Me "YOU have to finish packing now because we both know I won't finish until tomorrow morning. And I'll probably have other stuff I need to get done before we leave and I'm sure I'll be freaking out and I need you to be prepared to help me.
"And," I continued before he could try to foolishly force logic into the conversation,"don't tell me it would make more sense for me to finish packing now. If I do that, tomorrow morning I'll start thinking that I forgot to put something in the suitcase and then I'll have to start over! Can't you just let me freak out in peace? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!"
How I remained single for so many years is a mystery for the ages.
In any case, Opie did go ahead and pack (though I think I heard some muttered suggestions about how I should just make a list of things to pack and check them off or some other ridiculous nonsense), he is ready to help me tomorrow and I think our vacation is going to get off to a brilliant start.