Conversations With Kimbo

This is the kind of conversation you get to have when you are married to and traveling with me.

Me "I need you to finish packing."

Opie, slightly confused, "You know that you haven't finished packing, right? Your stuff's all over the spare room."

Me "Of course I know, I'm not a moron."

Opie  "Then why do I have to finish packing right now?"

Sometimes it's like he's meeting me for the first time.

Me "YOU have to finish packing now because we both know I won't finish until tomorrow morning. And I'll probably have other stuff I need to get done before we leave and I'm sure I'll be freaking out and I need you to be prepared to help me. 

"And," I continued before he could try to foolishly force logic into the conversation,"don't tell me it would make more sense for me to finish packing now. If I do that, tomorrow morning I'll start thinking that I forgot to put something in the suitcase and then I'll have to start over! Can't you just let me freak out in peace? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?!"

How I remained single for so many years is a mystery for the ages.

In any case, Opie did go ahead and pack (though I think I heard some muttered suggestions about how I should just make a list of things to pack and check them off or some other ridiculous nonsense), he is ready to help me tomorrow and I think our vacation is going to get off to a brilliant start.