If you’re wondering why I haven’t updated this blog in so
long, it’s simple: It has been a CRAZY
And not just in a “Kimberly’s Life Is Always Weird Plus
She’s Been Known To Exaggerate Ever So Slightly” kind of way.
It’s more like a “Kimberly’s Life Has Slid Off The Rails,
Why Does Everything Happen At Once?” situation.
And not just because the Yates have moved their Estate to a
whole new location…but I get ahead of myself!
So, to get myself back on track, I will repeat: It’s been a
crazy year.
If you know me at all, you know I started the year with skin
cancer…not the deadly variety but the one described on far too many websites as
able to cause “mutilating disfigurement.”
Which, to be honest, was not a phrase I handled well…though one I did
enjoy screaming at Opie with alarming frequency.
Which means the next few months of the year were spent
getting 4 different surgeries to remove the cancer and reconstruct my face.
Then, just to bump things up a notch, in the midst of all
this surgery, we moved into a new house.
And you’re probably saying to yourself, “Self,” you are
saying “It feels as if Kimberly might be sliding into that exaggeration thing
we’ve heard about. After all, LOTS of people move.”
Yes, they do.
However, most of them don’t move while suffering from kidney
stones. One of the first days we were moving things over, I had my first attack
and had to lie down (while yelling helpful instructions from the floor to Opie
about the proper placement of boxes). Then about 2:00 in the morning on the day
of the final move, I woke Opie up by stumbling to the bathroom and puking from pain.
So, off we went to the Emergency Room, a mere 5 hours before the movers were
set to arrive at our old house and pack everything up.
Once there the doctor there asked me a bunch of questions
about all the symptoms I had been experiencing in the previous weeks and
wondered why in the world I hadn’t come in sooner?! We explained about the move
and then I waved a hand at my scar and stitch-filled face and allowed as I’d
had a few other things on my mind.
He nodded sympathetically and asked “Burns?”
It is interesting to note that suggesting to a woman who is
already self-conscious about her
Frankenstein Face that it looks she took a
header into a firepit is NOT the way to convince her she’s going to be back to
her old self soon.
However, to be fair, this can be forgiven if you pump her
full of the proper amount of kidney stone pain reducing drugs.
In any case, we spent the rest of that day coordinating
trips to the urologist and scheduling a kidney stone surgery in between
deliveries of furniture and household goods.
So, as I said, not a normal move.
It’s also not normal to spend the second night in your dream
home huddled in the master closet to shelter from the tornado that is ripping
through the city. I mean, yes, tornadoes are fairly common in Oklahoma…but not
many people have to try to track the path of the tornado on social media
(because they don’t have their cable set up yet) as it hurtles toward the old
house they haven’t sold as well as the new house they just moved into while
also trying to convince an exhausted husband that the threat was real and
reassuring 2 frantic dogs that a small, dark windowless room was a fun place to
hang out.
(Note to self -- start hiding vodka in the storm shelter).
Luckily, although the tornado did crazy damage throughout
both neighborhoods, both our houses were spared. We had one section of fence
that was knocked down and lots of limbs in the yard but no major damage.
This is not only proof that God listens to our prayers it
also clearly shows that those prayers don’t have to be completely profanity
free.
But back to the crazy year!
After the move, I had surgery to break up the kidney stones and
we spent the next few months getting the old house ready to sell (Feeling
grateful for all our family and friends who went way above the call of duty to
help us do so! Special shout out to my mom who not only helped us but did so
while healing from a broken collarbone!), getting the new house unpacked, then
I accepted a new position at work, and we are FINALLY getting back to some
semblance of normalcy.
Or at least what passes for normal at The Yates Estates!
Though we’re bringing a new kitty home tomorrow and if history teaches us
anything, we can be sure he will be full of attitude and drama and will further increase the mayhem.
But, my point is, I’m finally back! Blogging again—hopefully
with more regularity—and getting my Etsy shop up and running again. I even got a couple new sets of cards created
and uploaded featuring some of the few pictures I managed to get out and take
during all this crazy business. I, of
course, gave the collections sweet titles like “Pretty In Pink” and “Sights of Spring” but in my heart the real name is “Skin Cancer Can Suck It!”
PS: It is also interesting to note that the first time I got
skin cancer, about 15 years ago, it also occurred right as I was buying and
moving into my first house. I’m not saying that I’m scared to ever move again
but I probably will get a full body scan done while we’re in the planning
phase!
